Blog Post 2/19/12

Read Epstein’s list on page 49 in his article, “What Makes a Good Parent?”, and identify how each parent from The Glass Castle individually rates on this list. Pick at least two of their strongest points and at least two of their weakest points and explain why you assessed them the way you did. Be specific and defend your assessments and don’t forget to assess the parents individually because they were two different parents with their own methods of parenting.

Both Jeanette’s parents scored similarly on Epstein’s list of “What Makes a Good Parent”. The first on the list is Love and Affection and I rated her parents individually from zero to ten, zero being the lowest rating and ten being the highest rating, I would say her mother scores a four on the love and affection and her father scores a seven. This is so because her father was more affectionate and tried to spend time with his kids and tried to do things like give his kids a star. He would try to show he cared for his kids when he could. Her mother on the other hand was less affectionate. She was always in her own world, working on a painting but I never saw she did anything affectionate with Jeanette or her siblings. When it comes to stress management, they both scored a two because I never saw an example of her parents practicing relaxation techniques. They did not really have a positive way of dealing with stress; they individually dealt with it in a negative way. Her father would disappear for days and her mother would be depressed. In relationship skills, they both got a one. They did not have the best relationship with each other and the example that they were setting for their kids was a negative one. There was sometimes when her father would beat his mom or just be aggressive towards her when he was drunk. They did not really hold any relationships with other people either so they didn’t have positive examples to show. Her parents were both rated a six when it came to autonomy and independence. They did encourage independence in their kids. They had that kind of attitude of being self-reliant. On education and learning, they both scored an eight. They scored the same because they both in some ways had their own way in encouraging their kids to pursue education, if not directly it been subtlety. For example, her mother wanted to become a painter, so she would always be working on a painting and didn’t give up on her dream despite the harsh reality, and that inspired Jeanette’s sister to pursue painting as well. Her father had a dream as well to make a more efficient way of burning fuel and despite his harsh reality as well, he didn’t give up on that plan either and that influenced his kids as well. Life skills was also on the list, and the description was providing for a child with a steady income and planning for the future. Jeanette’s parents had zero of those kinds of life skills. They never had a steady income because her father could not keep a job for too long, her mother didn’t work; only when absolutely necessary. And they didn’t make realistic future plans. Their situation was always an adventure; they would just pick up and leave. In behavior management, Jeanette’s mother scored a three and her father a six. They never really did punish their kids, her mother had a careless attitude and her father did enforce punishment when Jeanette or one of her siblings spoke against an elder person. Modeling a healthy lifestyle was on the list and they both scored a two. They hardly had food for their kids to eat, Jeanette was forced to look in the trash can for scraps of food that other kids left, and sometimes they would go days without food. Religion was also on the list and her mother scored a two and her father a zero. Her mother tried to go to church a few times but her father on the other hand never liked it. He would be drunk and speak against what they would say. Finally, her mother scored a one on the safety and her father a three. The one occasion that comes to mind was when Jeanette was severely burned at the age of three and her mother was not there to insure her safety and after she was burned she was strangely calm. Her father said would say that he would keep them safe and for the most part he did.

Jeanette’s mother strongest points were that she encouraged independence as well as education and learning. She inspired Jeanette’s older sister to pursue art and that pushed her to move to New York. Her weakest points were relationship skills and health because she did not show positive relationship skills with Jeanette’s father. They would not communicate and they would sometimes result in physical violence. Health was a weak point because she never went out to do exercise. She was depressed and would just be lying in bed.

Her father’s strong points were love and affection along with education and learning. He would try to spend time with his children and give them some sort of hope, that one day they were going to build the glass castle. He also had plans of making a more efficient way of burning fuel and that showed his children that he was smart and subtlety implanting an example of learning. His weak points were religion and relationship skills. He did not agree with religion and spoke out against them in the middle of a mass. His relationship skills were not the best; he often got into physical altercations with Jeanette’s mother and even held her out of a window once.